Confession of a Robfordholic

(Through Rose-Coloured Glasses)

May the Force be with You, Ford Nation.

Our Beloved Great Leader, Mayor Rob Ford is taking a leave of absence from Toronto City Hall, and went into hiding, in Chicago, hopefully seeking rehab treatment for his alcohol and drug addiction problems.

Some critic assumed Rob Ford is putting on a spin here, disappear for a month, and then return a new man, a so called “born again Christian”, to proclaim his complete cure, and to continue his mayoral campaign.

Some accused him of trying to avoid answering questions regarding the newly surfaced crack video tape and his sexist, vulgar audio tape, by running away.

Some thought his taking leave of absence to seek help is a good first step, but others think this is too little too late, and he should go all the way and resign.

Others just simply wish him well.

But for us Fordies, we are left hanging.

Now I, too, have to attend rehab and RFA (Rob Ford Anonymous) meetings, to deprogram me from my “Robfordholicism”.

Hi, my name is TRCG, and I am a Fordie. I am addicted to Rob Ford. Just mention of his name made me flutter, rise of temperature with sweat and anticipation. I felt anxious, and agitated. At the same time, I also felt ashamed, depressed, hopeless and powerless.

I am confused.

I associated with him as my idol, one who can do things that I can never do. He can proclaim he is not perfect and go on lying to his teeth, with no change of facial expression or colour.

He doesn’t need to be on any diet. Can’t lose any weight, doesn’t matter, and just let it go.

He can bully anyone, including the Chief of Police. He can pee in the park. He can buy drugs and beat up his best friend. And best of all, he can get away with these.

He is world famous / notorious. Jimmy Kimmel is his buddy. Bill Clinton talked about him. His every move is reported in the news, the world over.

And according to his calculations, he saved us a billion bucks!

He is my idol.

But now he is gone. My life felt empty and meaningless.

But, have no fear, the provincial election is on.

TimmyH, here I come.

《喜見莊子》__ 江紹倫

無求無待zhuangze

莊子名周,生活在戰國前期(約公元前350年)的宋國(今河南東北地區),當過地方小官,其他就記載不詳了。當時中國諸侯紛爭,社會動盪不安,民不聊生。生活在那種環境中,莊子憎惡昏君禮相,對人民寄予無限關愛及同情。

我們今天所見的《莊子》一書,大部份源於晉代(公元400年)郭象的注本,不是原著。

《莊子》最早的著錄見於《漢書》,說有五十二篇。郭象的注本有三十二篇,分內篇七,外篇十五,雜篇十一。一般學者認為,內篇是莊子的親著,外篇是他和後學的傑作,雜篇的作者則有多種說法。

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古文粵譯:瘞旅文__ 梁煥松 (71)

瘞旅文(王守仁)

維正德四年、秋月二日,有吏目云自京來者,不知其名氏;攜一子一僕,將之任,過龍場,投宿土苗家。予從籬落間望見之,陰雨昏黑,欲就問訊北來事,不果。
正德四年八月二日,有個自稱從北京城來的吏目,姓名無人知道;佢帶住一個細路仔、一個僕人,正要去上任,路過龍場呢個地方,投宿係當地苗人既屋企。我係籬芭罅睇見佢地,個陣時正落緊陰陰細雨,暗淡無光,我本來想去問下佢地北方情況而家點,結果都係無去到。

明早,遣人覘之,已行矣。薄午,有人自蜈蜙坡來,云一老人死坡下,傍兩人哭之哀。予曰:「此必吏目死矣。傷哉!」
第二朝,我派人過去睇下佢地,已經走左咯。將近中午,有人從蜈崧坡過來,報告話:「有個老人死係山坡底下,旁邊兩個人,喊得好凄涼。」我話:「一定係個吏目死左,傷心啊!」

薄暮,復有人來云,坡下死者二人,傍一人坐哭。詢其狀,則其子又死矣。明日,復有人來云,見坡下積尸三焉;則其僕又死矣。嗚呼傷哉!
到了傍晚,又有人來報:「山坡底下死左兩個人,旁邊坐著一個人坐係度喊。」問清楚情況,原來吏目個細路又死埋。第三天,又有人來報:「見到山坡底下三條屍體堆埋一齊。」我知道是吏目個僕人都死埋。唉!真係慘咯! Continue reading

《送東萊王學士無競》 陳子昂 (661-702) __ 江紹倫譯

寶劍千金買  平生未許人
懷君萬裡別  持贈結交親
孤松宜晚歲  眾木愛芳春
已矣將何道  無令白發新

Parting Gift                Chen Zhi Ang (661-702)   江紹倫譯

I bought this sword with a thousand gold
Never had I allowed anyone to hold

You are now going ten thousand li away
I give it to you as companion on your way

Pines love to breathe the wintry air
Other trees thrive in spring air

What more is there to say
Waste no words so my hair will slowly grey

古文粵譯:孟子見梁惠王__ 梁煥松 (71)

孟子見梁惠王(現代版)

孟子見梁惠王。王曰:「叟!不遠千里而來,亦將有以利吾國乎?」
孟子去見梁惠王。梁惠王說:「阿伯!你咁遠來到,有咩益我國先?」

孟子對曰:「王!何必曰利?亦有仁義而已矣。王曰:『何以利吾國?』大夫曰:『何以利吾家?』士庶人曰:『何以利吾身?』上下交征利,而國危矣。
孟子:「大王!駛乜一開口就講利益丫?講下仁義咪仲好!大王話:點樣可以益我個國家,班高官就會話:點樣可以益我老婆仔女,普通國民就會問:有咩可以益我,結果會係從上到下都爭奪利益,國家就玩完咖喇! Continue reading

《詩夢 》__ 江紹倫

夢是人們無意識的伸展發揮,驅幻想至無限。詩人慣用直觀和幻想感知和創造,運用文字魅力把心中的意象成Lu_Temple詩。

不知是否因為方塊字的特殊形象、形聲、形意和用部首結合成字的魅力,中國詩人在詩詞中提到夢的,遠比外國詩人頻密得多。幾乎沒有詩人不說夢的,有些更每首詩都提起夢。

最為民眾熟悉的夢故事是「黃粱美夢」,載於唐朝沈既濟的《枕中記》。

故事說,一位醉心榮華富華的盧生,在旅店遇見一名道士呂翁,向他提出自己的心願。道士給他一個舒服的枕頭,他枕着睡熟了,發了一個夢。夢中,他考試中舉,官至宰相,家中妻妾滿堂,奴僕數十,一直享福到八十多歲才安然死去。不料,他驟然醒覺,看見自己睡前蒸下的飯仍然未熟,感到十分失望惆悵。對此,道士安慰他說:〝人生的榮華富貴,都不過是一場短夢,得與失都是過眼雲煙,你不必在意而傷心。〞

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古文粵譯:馮諼客孟嘗君__ 梁煥松 (71)

馮諼客孟嘗君(戰國策)

齊人有馮諼者,貧乏不能自存,使人屬孟嘗君,願寄食門下。孟嘗君曰:「客何好?」曰:「客無好也。」曰:「客何能?」曰:「客無能也。」孟嘗君笑而受之,曰:「諾!」左右以君賤之也,食以草具。 
齊國有個人叫馮諼,窮到周身唔得惦,就搵人去同孟嘗君講,想投靠佢係門下做食客。孟嘗君問:「此人有何長處?」來人回答:「無乜長處。」又問:「有乜才能?」回答:「沒乜才能。」孟嘗君笑住應承話:「好喇!」左右既人以為孟嘗君睇唔起馮諼,所以只俾D粗茶淡飯佢食。 Continue reading

肥福新「新數」

(Through Rose-Coloured Glasses)

報載 : 世界經濟合作与发展組織 (Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development OECD), 公佈了一个調査報告, 在它的六十五个会員国中, 兒童的教育水平, 加拿大是佔了第六位, 但其中的數学教育, 在最近的九年来, 水平卻不斷下降了14%。這引至加拿大數个省份, 安省, 卑詩省, 緬省, 亜省, 和沙省的家長們, 都要求老師放棄「新數教学」, 從回到基本的數学教学方法, 不再用 SUDOKU 来教乘數表, 用電子遊戲来教 3X4 等新方法。

這又難怪, 肥福市長, 分分鐘, 口口声声, 都認為他上任僅僅三年, 就為多倫多市民慳了一億元。嘩! 談何容易啊!

其实這又易过借火啦, 原来他用的計算方法, 就是更新的肥福新「新數」。

試解肥福新「新數」方程式之祕:

(一) 实贏之道

0 + 0 = 5

試解: 有如買彩票, 一張 Lotto Max要花費五元, 不能擔保一定会贏錢, 但留下五元不買, 不就是实赢了五元嗎?

(二) 大平賣

A – b = (A – b) + C + D + ……

試解: 很多時, 以為跳樓貨, 平通全市, 祇買, 但後来發覺, 卻要搭上很多額外開支, 更貴。但跟朋友談起, 一定只会強調又慳了多少錢。

(三) 新 Ponzi Scheme

A – b = C + b

試解: 新俠盜羅賓漢, 劫 A 濟 B; B 減費而 A 加費, 只要 B 是忠实選民 又可以領功了。

(四) 減減得加

SERVICE —> service + ADMIN FEE + HANDLING FEE + fee  + fee  + fee

試解: 轉嫁危机, 人人自危

For detail,  go to

www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4qMEOc9VfQ#t=71